Recycled lines

The pain in my
Depths, the
Bowels of my
'No' self
To know self
Are the pains
That show
'Yes'
The ever
Breathing consonants
Of constant
reflection.
Wrap up in all of it
And I'll show you myself
mine me yours
Into ether

Reopen

I am not broken
Though I break
And daily
I let the whole world
Take
But call me sick
Because shock
Takes hold of my heart
Which holds
No lock

Questions for you

Who are you
My what?
When can I meet
You wherever?
You know  that
I miss you
A lot
And my
feet are as light
As a feather
So dance with me
Sweetly
Tender new
Mystery
Into ether
And on

Porch light

When I say home
I mean my bones.
Home is dark
And I'm alone.
But every night
Neighbors or not
I let shine a light

On my front porch
My beacon and
Last resort.

creation pt. mine

caving in
a bitter explode
to ask and to
know
is a burn and
a bang.
all alone
in itself.
my ribs
my spine
my fingers
brush the
hairs
of the world
in true
excuse.
...
but or
if
and on
butter
if
and cut
hold me
up
like
water
or hands
or
a word.
just one to
bide my life
another moment.
...
all of the sudden
and out of the blue
a thought of me
has melted to you
all but danger
to nothing but me
turned to life
to yellow
and green.
and just like that
my hurtfuls and
separates
n o t h i n g
cold and warm
and pretty
and yes
nest of tinder
for tenderness
to burn this winter

pride and skin

pt.1
the silence in you
has deafened me
i cannot wake up
the morning
the evening
the in-betweens
catch in my throat
with a song
of contented
anger
of chaotic stillness
wholly pieces
of sad
happies
please dont go
but please come back
my gone
to stay with me
...
tears i cry
but for
laughings sake
and i laugh
for the touch
i touch for
passions sake
and i spill.
cant you hear
for god sakes?
im yelling
with no
lungs.

pt.2
for a glimpse
i whimsy
for you.
like birds
fly
take me
up-down
the not so much
the never so
soons
and the millions
of burnt up moons
world not listens
you but see
you hear
i know.
the music
the fun
the sad
oh pitty.
ill rip out my 
guts to
tell you
youre pretty.

pt.3
dig me a hole
to climb up in
cut me a soul
to wear my friend.

ah, but you have.
and i have nots.
but a bunch
take them
wrap up in them
and ill show
you
myself.

the never-come-out
sad man
is peeking through
my skin.
the wish i have
to not but
yes
to up and
murder him.

not me
but him
so sad and
feeling.

im feeling
for a pride.
you can have
it when it
gets here.

all wrapped up
and stamped up
and boxed up
tied
pride
pride
pride
of mine.
me.
and
yours.

Excerpt

To see me
And know me
Is to have
Watched me
Escape.
Trust me
With my
Rusty
Bolts for bones.
My capacity
exceeds
That of your
Steeds
That carry
You far away
Home.

afterlife

my heaven
my nirvana
is my legacy.
please let my legacy
be one of
love.
my reincarnation
needs be one
of creation.
learning.
building.
loving.
so needs be
my legacy.
i have eaten of the tree
oh god
but so have i
from many vines.

Flag

My nation is my neighbor
My creed is my love
And my hands
And fingers are my flag
With the spirit and
Power of God
~into ether~

What I am

I am an ocean
A swelling wave maker
I am a grave
A cold still
Pit.
I am the shame
Under your
Makeup
And the pride
Of a new father.
I am alive.
All of me.
My stillness
Waits with energy
My sadness builds
A home for my joy
That thunders
Through the sky.
I am alive.
Even in death.
I am alive.

staying healthy

The well that you dig
is that which you drink from.
The grain that leaves your hands
joyously,
is that which truly
nourishes.

Speaking English

Speak not while talking
move your words
In the dance
Forever upwards
moths to the light
Lets you and me
Talk tonight
Screen doors
Want mores
And cant haves
Cut halves
Our souls

My ghost
Met most
Of yours
Toast
The dampened cool
lamp lit fool
Of us

fox monologue

what a trick
to be so slick
as to pull one over my eyes
and oh so steady
to catch me ready
for nothing but a surprise

natureplay

a summer tree
bids me a shadow
to dance all over the grass
a school of grass
bids me a shimmer
under the wind at last

the sun whispers
with far off flames
to tip me 'afternoon'
my eyes can wander
all over the world
still without enough room

faith healing and planting by the signs

When stars won't shoot,
or ever even fall,
and you're left standing,
but not so tall,

tired
done
almost.

grit your teeth
in the loudest silence
sit down
with the stillest violence
and
hold tight in your gut and chest
the truth.
i'll sing the rest

"this little light of yours
you're gonna let it pour
this little light of mine
im gonna let it shine
these little lights of ours
we're gonna light like stars
in the sky
in the sky
way up high"

hi there

hello self.

hold me tight.

hug me still.

sing at night.

pray.

sleep.

stay.

keep.

and don't forget that

your heart has at night-time

that which it takes in the morning.

and the dew is sweeter

when the grass is thankful.

what impossible looks like

an egg was sunk deep in the sea
she soon grew up to be a tree
her leaves are feathers
and her time whenevers
up over my waves of me

hills

bones of my friends will fill
the shallows of the earth until
the mud under the gallows
hallows the halls
of my heart
with the holy decay
from my last day
forward and on and on
not lost but yon
over the hills of
dreams.

the only honest evil

Fear is left defenseless

when confronted with a mirror

you can leave him senseless

"you're not welcome here"

what it looks like

there was a hurtful
out in my yard
fogging up my window
and whispering hard
its eyes hot red
and its body all black
once out of my head
it all came back
he slid on the ground
and seeped through the walls
and scampered around
in the moonlit halls.

letter home

i would not trade this
my sad.
for a world of happy good
or glad.
the hurt means heart
holds it
together. not apart
folds it,
you and me
us together
let it be
us together
my sweet sweet

you x7

getting the sitting
wont do for the gritting.
forgetting?
I'll remind you;
the grind you
find inside, you
put your whole mind to,
and hind.sight won't
blind you or try to
cry your eyes it.
can, but.. you wont you
cry for yourself..
dont
let it do it
for you.

tornado

dirty muddy rolling
hills
full and dripping stinky
stills
grayish cloudy purple
skies
widely opened big brown
eyes
two or three or four anxious
pair
upwardly stupidly in
despair
nasty swirling dirty
twisters
scooping sweeping the brown eyed
sisters

an undoubtably curdling bumpy ride
whirring screaming (whip)
'rawhide'

moonsong

cool and warm is the moon
soft like to eat with a spoon
strong in heart
and quick to start
i hope it gets dark pretty soon

beating the devil. (no banjo included)

I didn't ever play with any body else
whatever they would say wasn't very nice
The teachers knew I had brains that I didn't use
and the coaches couldn't make me run. there wasn't any use.

Why? At night I got the best of me
I was inevitably eaten up by my waking dreams
and spit out with all the other little nasty things
inside, and used to cut off my hopeful happy wings,
burn out. my throat until i couldn't sing
I knew. it wasn't anything
true,
but that little bit of nothing hurt my everything.
through.
I got over that. fast
like a thousand horse. power boat singing. hurt my tired throat so I. went ahead and wrote. down every quiet note. with a letter. they got evil. hurt the devil. better. stuck him in the dirt with his rusty lying shovel. never-
whenever the devil comes out
will I let him forget when I gave him a bout
with the knuckles that I wrote to knock his ass down
and told him what HE should stay up crying about.

showdown

chafed, chapped, and ready.
stood the two.
squared up. spit. steady

mississippi slow talk
just shot
arkansas quickdraw

he thought

but the red
filled his shirt.
.knees.

its prayer time boy.
yaw.

expansion

yes. cumulative am I.

bone of bone before

blood of blood of blood.

never will I know no more 

forever will I flood

a hand at work long long ago

has found its way to me

to caress to hold and to let go

so a hand will be received

yes. cumulative am I.

Syllables

I speak well, when my thoughts are small.
but BIG I might not say at all.
unless I make some rules.

that was eight. eight. six.
and this is five. six. six.
I use my words as tools.

And I try to use them all.
and that was seven. 

Truth vs. Deception

memories and predictions

always haunt me

backwards and forwards

they taunt me

the present escapes

it disappears

like mist in the sunlight

my biggest fears

push and squeeze

God, show me, please

the truth

before i choke

 

garment studies 1

i did not fit my shirt today
and about this i have to say
stretch stupid shirt
i will not tie my shoes tomorrow
and so i guess ill have to borrow
your nasty slippers.
thanks

the visitor outside

the air around me became instantly thin
I couldn't see a bit
my ears stood up, I froze, and then
my heart started throwing a fit
I don't know how, but I was flying
my feet never moved so fast,
lock the doors, suppress the crying,
maybe he'll leave at last.

creation pt. 2

the largest piece of black construction paper was interrupted by an explosion of glitter.
BANG!
God created the nightshift government.
a lion, a crab, a scorpion, a snake, hunters, tools, chariots...
it was good.

worms

silver starry dew
touch it.
I dare you.
you'll be touching the stars
to the worms anyway
a drop of water is mars
and grass is a super-highway

bedtime battle

the devil tries to sleep with me.
and he is never still.
I tell him not to stay in here
he whispers soft 'i will'
Jesus Jesus Jesus
tell him please to leave
Jesus Jesus Jesus
I really do believe

hillside 1

spattered on the dirt
green yellow green
the water wipes the rocks
clean slick clean
rain said hello
sun shines yellow
the 'never come out sad man'
I've never even seen

you are pretty

I have looked at the moon

a whole whole lot

I have felt of the sunshine too.

but never have I ever
looked at or felt

anything as pretty as you.

pines

the hills boil up there
well down maybe
the steam catches the air
it's called fog really

the smell of the world's biggest mud pie:
pine.

and the tops belong to me:
mine.

i breathe in through my nose.
as much of an explorer as any.
i breathe out from my mouth
the air that's breath for many

just as it is yours;
mine

The man with the blue balloon

one day a man with a blue balloon.

walked around and whistled a tune.

he saw a girl with a pretty smile.

so they sat and talked a while.

before he got up and went away.

he gave her the balloon. it started that day:

she missed the man an awful lot

it was nearly every thought.

for every thought she had of it

she'd blow it up a little bit.

time went on and then one day

they met again while on their way.

she said "look sir. I've stretched it out."

he said "I knew you would without a doubt."

mermaid

silence. it is moons turn

shh shh shh

the water says

sleep to the endless churn

shh shh shh

the water says

I know she is out in there somewhere

shh shh shh

the water says

swimming and oh her golden hair

shh shh shh

the water says

spit it out

something never

whenever you want comes out

to say

just inside

your brain

sits

the word and

another

up and up

swell

whatever

gets bigger

it is

cant figure

you it

out

agh.

never mind

you don't have to say it.

they can see it in your face.

I promise

playtime

in the day you can find me swimming

with mermaids and pirates and fishing

in the night i'll be out flying

with the planets and on the stars i'll be wishing.

if the pavement is wet, i'm sailing far

my boat crashes down in the gutter

if it is hot and you smell the tar

i'm bathing in the freedom of summer

until now i wanted you with me

but then i didn't know who

now that i know and now that i'm ready

i hope you'll bathe with me too

haint

a ghost follows me from time to time

he blows in through my fan

or taps me in the breeze

if a hill i choose to climb

he pulls my hand

and tugs my sleeves

if it's sleep i really want

he whispers fast

and flickers bright

he's the subtle kind of haunt

that doesn't last

but through the night

bedhead

I went to bed with my heart unsettled.

I woke up bright with my head disheveled.

So if a hurt inside,

comes out in my hair,

I take it all back.

life IS fair.

if I could wrap it up

if I could I really would

give you these so read on please

the cool wet ground

the air all around

the laughter of a hundred frogs

the fire from all the cut up logs

a summer breeze

the swaying trees

a word that meant . all words.

(one)

the song of all your favorite birds

(one)

and another goodnight kiss

just (one) that meant a million

~I love you

creation pt.1

the world was like a baseball

lacking leather, that's all.

the pitch? a sixty six thousand seven hundred mile per hour curve

the jumbo tron lit up the place

that was the sun. in space.

it was good. STRIKE

bargemen

waves pound the side

while the bundled sit and ride

...or float rather

down the wide river...

the one that might be a sea.

lights glow and sway

bells dance and play

...or ring maybe

almost sing really...

prettiest damn song that bells could sing.

colors

a color inside

is crawling outside

it fills my words

and thats the upside

it fills my head

it spills out red

blue and yellow

until i'm dead

when i stop

out will pop

a beautiful sprig of grass.

right from the top of my head

music

dirty handed man

the wind blows for you

showered hand shaker

for you the sky is blue

for the steering wheel drummer

the lights will change some more

practiced fisherman

who else do the trout slurp for?

for my love the sun will shine

for my love the moon will rise

just as she is mine

the stars are her surprise

responsibility

built to build

is all of mankind,

until the world is filled

with the progress of mind,

but since every brain

must stop and rot,

finish this chore,

mankind will not.

it is up to you

to create

a positive place.

you mustn't wait

another nighttime

if they plant me in the ground,

I hope that no one makes a sound.

if the light bulbs all go dim,

I hope you won't be mad at them.

and if I do not fall asleep,

help me, god, my day to keep.

goodnight

goodnight moon

goodnight stars

goodnight fire

goodnight cars

and goodnight mostly

listen closely

I love:

you

Bones

if the bones come out to dance,

i might have to take a chance.

put one foot in front the other,

and stamp the leaves with boney smother.

water

the potter cant create

the hollow of the soul,

and no one can relate

or follow down the hole.

i wont dive anymore

maybe i'll just fish.

i do not know what for,

whatever fills my dish

locomotivation

my marrow laced with vigor

to cure me of my rigor

hold my sinew strung with hours

of pulling tender flowers.

my breath is like the steam

exuding from my machine

built for the construction

and the reasonable destruction

of all that is

and all that will

be man

tie me to this seat

but you will never eat

the meal of my disposition

unfinished 1

the time is here that all the world should know,

my voice should boom across the sands and snow,

for peoples ears my voice may not be loud,

but shall be heard by every brooke and cloud,

the birds will shush and fish will slow their swim,

the mammals and the bugs this is for them:

fear not the follies of my fellow man

morning

i woke up this morning

with a hurt deep inside

the soft kind, like a burning

a want so big that i cried.

for togetherness and for peace

for safe and for warm

please sometime soon at least?

i've lived for it since i was born.

i got up and i peeled back the velamen

i cried myself to the roots

and i sat on the edge of my bed and then

i started to pull on my boots.

i want more of what i get

selfish? i don't think so

but don't you ever forget

how happiness hurts me though

mud

the sunshine fills my blood

like it will for years

my blood is made of mud

and love and sweat and tears

the girl again

you see, my brain is lazy,

when it's warm out there.

she starts to drive me crazy

i can't think. this isn't fair.

life is full of beauty,

but my eyes just can't perceive,

she's so stinkin' pretty,

man, you won't believe.

sleep machine 2

the fan whirrs near the door

a sound i've heard before

the window fights the breeze

it's nice on nights like these

they say that spring is here

but the crickets outside, i fear,

have forgotten how to chirp.

my sheets are tight and cool

and my body tries to fuel

no pillows, i don't like them

no lights lit, the moon's dim

i nod and doze myself

with a book pulled from the shelf

my sleep is full of whirrrrrr

my words may start to slur

purpose

as the sunshine fills my skin, my lungs, and my eyes

my palms tingle, and they weave through the springtime skies.

my heart beats with the blood of a thousand thinkers

as my feet churn on the pavement of industry

i feel the dirt underneath them move through me.

the advancement of mankind lives in my bones

the girl

sometimes i feel as though i have pulled the door off of my microwave oven, plunged my melon into the newly created cavity, set the apparatus to 'popcorn', and plugged the chord into her brain....... fssssssssssss ssssssshhhhhhh POW! instant enlightenment

mama's tea

the clouds shaded our skin

and we decided to sit inside

but when we huddled in

was when mama cried

she opened up and rained

and let her feelings out

she watered every flower

and quenched the jumping trout

the dirt, now mud,

up on the earthy table

grew a healthy cud

to fill the farmer's stable

the best tea ever made

comes from leaves and rot

I would rather mama cry

than fear that she will not

Ice cream

snow covers the ground

it's the icing on the cake

when the moon comes around

they'll have themselves a date

she'll shine her silver shimmer

he'll steam and he'll gleam

I guess they'll call that moon ice cream

my room is cold

but that's the way it is

and I shouldn't mind

the winter's bitter kiss

but I get so cold

when I feel so alone

then I think of you

and I start to feelin' warm

Moonlight and Mtn. Dew

moonlight and Mtn. Dew,

and the crickets of course,

and the sounds of tires chew,

and the whinny of the horse,

the torrent of the river,

and the black of the sky,

topped with the stars like glitter,

that look close as the crow flies,

the asphalt and the gravel,

and the mud and the grass,

the long slender poles,

topped with buzzing bulbs in glass,

when you're out looking,

there is so much you can do,

but everything is better,

when I write it down for you.